' " i see and i blow;

viewed;;[back once more ]

i am so like dead tired...
not tat i do not really wanna not stay there..
but the people there.. the things tat is going on there..
juz pressure me out!!!
almost had the feeling of juz screamming in the morning somemore..
like scream le go out of my mind..

there is this pressure.. tat made me dun wanna go back.. and stress... may be lowed..
but.. i start to feel another stress coming.. i not sure bout it.. juz feels so in me tats all
maybe time to come when i truely be in imh..

sorry.. juz having the feeling so oso
.. blog later

i bubblied around at,,
wished u are with me 6:11 pm

viewed;;[exams over!! weet ]

cooL 1st time using ferdy's lappie to blog!!

lol
so much of stressful situations..
lol.. i not toking bout exams.. cuz
eh... i dunno lahz.. i wanna go out to feel my mind out of every thing mahz..
haha
lol..

papers over!! wadeva...
none of my business..
i not in the modds of studies anyway..
but now lol.. every thing is over..
tml ice skate!!!~~~
cool!! but sk & tengs not going!!!

then asked lin.. she free le.. but.. dear!!
exam on friday!!
wad the hell lorz...!!
so sian.. nix.. juz for ur info..
juz go..
dun care hav grps of 4 or not
cuz the grp going in of 4 is including u le!!

haha
now i still dunno y feel so lost..
i dunno wad i wanna do now oso.. since nothing do so blog lorz..

and cuz i promised after paper i blogged!! so i am here
lolssss...

laughing spree!!
haha with the help of the skill copy!!

lols... so many noes laughing spree.. so needa copy a bit..
but i dun really laugh.. all typed laughing tats all..

haha.. now only tengs watching me blog..
then sk playing the psp GOC..
ferdy and jac.. *sigh* dunno where they go liaoz.. tengs waiting for his apple pie..
and me... my strawberri sundae!! i do hope... when they back..
my strawberri sunday not be come strawberri milk shake or worse..
empty!!

haha.. tengs apple pie at most cooled down tats all!!

haha.. nite then blog agains..

!!! sk eating lollipop!!!
i wannnnnnn!!!!
T.T!!!!!

Lut

i bubblied around at,,
wished u are with me 2:52 pm

viewed;;[boredom ]

boring day..
sodokued most of the time...

so bored.. so sian!! so tired..
i wonder how can i study??
really has no mood at all manz..

haha..

/me hope to to goes into the comfort of a bubble..

i bubblied around at,,
wished u are with me 6:36 pm

viewed;;[things are happening ]

i made a teddy..
in uniform.. named it after my brother..

okie..

watched the fireworks..
and yay!! i can see the whole thingy..
with my sun glasses on.. only tat the tree blocking the high high shots..

nvm.. it was beautiful..

okie enough of the fireworks

juz wanna say..

y does it hav to be tat when a person is down??
the rest will be down as well??
cant the rest pull tat downed 1 up??
these questions start to come to me..
probs do happen..
and from wad i see.. it is sure getting long..
i noe it may be complicated..
but i am not blaming anyone..
and i dun hav the rite to do it..
but i juz wanna hav a say in between..
thou stories hav the main characters and the subs..

i noe the mains are impt.. but some how..
no matter how impt they are..
the story will not be any story without the subs..
so pls i do mean pls.. dun make the story within ur selfs..
i noe each hav their reasons.. but this part of the story is dragging long

i may not noe how u guys are going to put the end to it..
but pls do not take long.. i may not be able to see thru wad is happening soon..

i oso noe ppl hav their ups and downs.. things may hav links everywhere
am i juz unable to truely unable to show my saddness??
or juz ppl around shows it too easily..
tats i am not sure..

i may not be part of it.. i only kan bu sia qu liaoz..
i can lend me ears for listening.. juz.. stories differ.. feeling differ
thinkings differ.. sometimes.. i wanna help in everyway i can..
but i truely truely dunno how le..

and ange.. u told me b4.. bout calling the dears and stuff with ur feelings and stuff like tat...
even as from frenz..
i only realize.. especially amoung guys...
juz.. may be the so-called "pride" is there..
they only seemed to at most accept the name u call..
but not the feeling u added to call together..
juz tat.. i kinda missed tengs dear and the rest..
thou i juz saw them.. but i dun feel like tat they truely reply me..
saw dear for so short time..
tengs oso not in good mood..
others.. hav their own coupling and stuff to tok about..
juz tat..
i feel closer to LCO and further from LOL..
but i feel the drifting away from LCO too..
like i am stuck between super close from LCO and super far..
times seems so close and times seem miles away..
wadeva.. maybe i am thinking too much..
or not tat is i am filling my head with too much stuff..

i may juz wanna escape.. but i cannot bring myself thru.. like not wanting to hurt myself more..
i am scared...and i do hate.. fights and lots of disagreements btw my frenz.. especially some where i am unknown to help.. the feeling is so bad lahz.. and i can nvr bring myself not to think bout it..

i so juz wanna sleep.. with someone with me... i may juz need some care tat i truely wanted..
some feeling from others to me.. and let me sleep there under this care comfortably..

i bubblied around at,,
wished u are with me 1:47 am

viewed;;[hey ]

okie.. back here to blog..

i juz wanna say
i wanna skate.. .
but it seems.. i dunno.. so last min getting ppl to go
cuz i juz cannot seem to plan ahead.. but all like the nite b4
so is my fault.. i cannot blame on others..

and b4 i forget..
happie belated 41st birthday Singapore

oh ya.. sk as been coming to my house since like national day eve..
so sad..

somehow feeling kinda missed tengs..
haha..
wanna tok.. walk go out for movies or something.. i mean for being with the rest too

but.. sianz.. the boredom comes in.,.
like.. dunno wad movie to catch, dunno wad to do,,
dunno where to walk or even where to start..

so sianz..
exams coming too.. juz like next week..
and i havnt really started.. nothing seems to interest me to even put a detail into my memory
tats memory only.. not understanding yet

tats like so bad..
i juz wanna destress b4 i can study..

has been sleeping thru the days lately.. cuz of my flu and stuff..
feels so uncomfy...

of to my lala-land.. nites guys

i bubblied around at,,
wished u are with me 12:19 am

viewed;;[pissed time over ]

yay!!

BCLS pass!!
okie okie..

only after i retake..
after 1 hour i failed..

so relieved..
=DD

now still using alvin's lappie.. with him in lecture.. i think
and some others retaking..
so now this area quite empty..
cuz the grp tat was here has gone..

oso nothing to do..

haha ferdy now beside me..

going off at 3 for tut..
for the last 5 to finish their presentation for their
patient education!!

then no more 2036!!
okie okie..
now i oso no need worry bout 2043
then tml still hav open book for clinical trials..
and monday for developmental sociology..

after that then can worry bout exams le..

juz now.. felt so relax menz!!

haha!! kamalia so good!! its good to hav her for clinical lecturer!!

okie okie.. i shall stop this post for now..

juz wanna say something..

i miss the lion...

Lut^^] of [LCO] & >LoL<

i bubblied around at,,
wished u are with me 1:59 pm

viewed;;[pissed!! ]

wad the hell!!

failed my one man CPR!! so idiotic!!

hasnnah failed too.. bout 11 or 12 ppl failed in my class lorz..
all of us were like so pissed!!

jjuz feel so unfair lahz..
some of us taken by our ex-mentor failed.. she only passed 1 of all that went to her!!

i feel unjust lorz!!
i only had 1 chance!!
and she only say y i put the face shield wrongly after i finished..

then i juz went bac.. tried on same dummy..
then i put the shield a different way..
then!!
all perfect lorz!!

so so unjust..

okie okie.. still in school.. using alvin's lappie..
i cope from sk to use for this... to type out wad i feel menz!!

okie okie.. done with my c/ping..

i bubblied around at,,
wished u are with me 12:23 pm

viewed;;[saddness ]

i am not sure y..

juz the feeling of questions..
tons of them..

and i do not noe who is able to truely answer them..

juz tat the feeling of lost sets in..
the confusion of whether i truely hav accepted it
i am not sure myself.. am i unknowingly acting out??
but whatever.. feeling much better after typing out some stuff..

oh ya.. b4 i forget
i here by wish all nurses and student nurses a happy nurse's day..

okie okie..
tml go school juz 4 1 lecture.. after tat.. may join in the celebration a while..

after tat i wanna go cut hair..

and anyone up for national day eve go skate??
that means next tues??

i bubblied around at,,
wished u are with me 11:53 pm