' " i see and i blow;

viewed;;[things are happening ]

i made a teddy..
in uniform.. named it after my brother..

okie..

watched the fireworks..
and yay!! i can see the whole thingy..
with my sun glasses on.. only tat the tree blocking the high high shots..

nvm.. it was beautiful..

okie enough of the fireworks

juz wanna say..

y does it hav to be tat when a person is down??
the rest will be down as well??
cant the rest pull tat downed 1 up??
these questions start to come to me..
probs do happen..
and from wad i see.. it is sure getting long..
i noe it may be complicated..
but i am not blaming anyone..
and i dun hav the rite to do it..
but i juz wanna hav a say in between..
thou stories hav the main characters and the subs..

i noe the mains are impt.. but some how..
no matter how impt they are..
the story will not be any story without the subs..
so pls i do mean pls.. dun make the story within ur selfs..
i noe each hav their reasons.. but this part of the story is dragging long

i may not noe how u guys are going to put the end to it..
but pls do not take long.. i may not be able to see thru wad is happening soon..

i oso noe ppl hav their ups and downs.. things may hav links everywhere
am i juz unable to truely unable to show my saddness??
or juz ppl around shows it too easily..
tats i am not sure..

i may not be part of it.. i only kan bu sia qu liaoz..
i can lend me ears for listening.. juz.. stories differ.. feeling differ
thinkings differ.. sometimes.. i wanna help in everyway i can..
but i truely truely dunno how le..

and ange.. u told me b4.. bout calling the dears and stuff with ur feelings and stuff like tat...
even as from frenz..
i only realize.. especially amoung guys...
juz.. may be the so-called "pride" is there..
they only seemed to at most accept the name u call..
but not the feeling u added to call together..
juz tat.. i kinda missed tengs dear and the rest..
thou i juz saw them.. but i dun feel like tat they truely reply me..
saw dear for so short time..
tengs oso not in good mood..
others.. hav their own coupling and stuff to tok about..
juz tat..
i feel closer to LCO and further from LOL..
but i feel the drifting away from LCO too..
like i am stuck between super close from LCO and super far..
times seems so close and times seem miles away..
wadeva.. maybe i am thinking too much..
or not tat is i am filling my head with too much stuff..

i may juz wanna escape.. but i cannot bring myself thru.. like not wanting to hurt myself more..
i am scared...and i do hate.. fights and lots of disagreements btw my frenz.. especially some where i am unknown to help.. the feeling is so bad lahz.. and i can nvr bring myself not to think bout it..

i so juz wanna sleep.. with someone with me... i may juz need some care tat i truely wanted..
some feeling from others to me.. and let me sleep there under this care comfortably..

i bubblied around at,,
wished u are with me 1:47 am